Milestones and Stories

Anniversaries are kind of like birthdays.  They acknowledge the passing of time, remind us of days long gone and those to come, and [in some cases] leave us in denial about our age.  In fact, I saw a meme on Facebook lately that said "people who have more birthdays are happier, healthier, and tend to live longer."  That's some pretty deep stuff for Facebook, but hey, it certainly does get the point across.  Today my parents are celebrating their silver anniversary, or 25 years of marriage.  It's a special day because 25 years is quite a long time but also a significant milestone.  A lot has happened in 25 years, especially the most recent 21 and 18 years, respectively.  And in honor of this remarkable occasion, I want to acknowledge the obvious and not-so-obvious things my parents did for my brother and me as children (or now, young adults).

1) They made education a priority.  This kind of came naturally considering my mom was a kindergarten teacher, but besides that school always played a major role in our everyday lives.  Both my brother and I have been enrolled in school since we were 2 years old and were fortunate enough to grow up in an environment centered not on academic achievement but love of learning.  They frequently encouraged us to pursue academic subjects outside the classroom through extracurricular involvements or studying abroad.  Their notion of working hard to achieve our own personal bests allowed us to thrive in school, and will be a lesson that I will carry with me throughout my life and share with my own children.

2) They were engaged.  My parents have always made their best effort to be involved and engaged wherever possible.  They sat on (and chaired) the Parents Association at School; served as class parents in both the classroom and on sports teams; drove all over creation for religious school, cross-country meets, and football games; attended dance, piano, and chorus recitals; hosted friends and took photos for proms and winter formals; came up to visit for every college parents' weekend; trekked up to North Carolina multiple summers to drop us off at camp and more.  They did everything they could be to make sure we were happy while going above and beyond their parental duties.

3) They gave are giving us some pretty good memories.  It's nearly impossible to put into words some of the funny experiences that we have gone through as a family, because that's how inside jokes work.  Traveling certainly gave us some good ones (the Chinese restaurant in Kyoto; "where are my keys?" at Disney World; giving my dad a camp "Long Cruise" experience in Morehead City), as does pretty much everything we do at home (quote movie lines at the dinner table; silly arguments over who takes out the trash; swimming in the pool during the summer).  The smaller ones definitely have some competition with the bigger ones, but as a whole they gave us a pretty memorable childhood and adolescent experience.  Who can say that they ran their first half marathon with their dad at 20 years old or has the exact same taste in literature as their mom?  Most of my favorite memories come from us just being together, and for that I am truly grateful.

4) They taught us the importance of humility.  As mentioned before, my parents placed a heavy emphasis on the importance of us doing our best and never settling for any less.  To them, being proud of an achievement was just as-if not more-important as receiving recognition for it (of course, recognitions and awards were still celebrated when earned).  This allowed us to develop more of an internal locus of control and focus on the importance of competing with ourselves and not others.  That's not to say that we aren't competitive when it comes to social media.  The competition for "likes" and "comments" is alive and well, and sometimes can get a little heated, but all that aside I believe this is one of the greatest lessons that my parents have shared with us as kids and one that permeates our daily lives.

5) They made family dinners a priority.  While maybe the smallest item on this post in regards to materialism, it probably has one of the most significant values.  For as long as I can remember, my family has had dinner together every night.  Four people sitting around the table talking about our days was a habit while I lived at home and has turned into one of my favorite parts about coming back since I moved.  This simple act probably contributed more to my childhood than I can express.  Even when someone had a test or had to work late or we ended up just eating Sushi House takeout out of styrofoam boxes, we all got to share a meal at night.  Still to this day it remains one of my most favorite family traditions and is something that I encourage sharing with my friends and roommates as well as one that I hope to share someday with my own family.

All that I am, or that I can hope to be, I credit to my parents.  Thank you for being a shining light in our lives, and congratulations on achieving this incredible milestone in your life together.  May the next 25 years bring you as much happiness as the first, and I hope that the past 21 and 18 years have brought you just as much (if not more) joy as the first 4.